I started to do things I love

I am someone who just got out of depression. And something that pulled me out was music and my own imagination. I tried explaining my feelings, that feeling of not having interest in anything, that feeling of thinking how anything is worth it, or that feeling of just wanting to cry. I understand how you try to tell someone but you just can’t get your point across, you feel like your world is crumbling. How you feel like everything is pointless. For me, I started to imagine a reality with someone who truly understood me and loves me for who I am, a reality where all those thoughts did not exist. I did this for a long time and stayed depressed. Not a lot of people knew, and the people that did know where starting to get tired because I would always scream at them. They thought it was useless to help someone who did not want to help themselves. But honestly, I was the person trying to break free from this feeling of isolation, where all I wanted was to scream and get annoyed, so I started distancing myself from others and slowly even the people the loved me stopped trying and started getting annoyed. That was my lowest point, where everything anyone said felt very critical and I felt like an absolute failure. I started to visit this reality more where I had the life I wanted and could freely speak my mind. But the one day I realized, I wanted that reality, I wanted to break free. So I started visiting my past of when I was happy and felt successful l. From when I did not have this icky feeling that I did something wrong. I started writing down my anger and every emotion I felt that I could not explain and tore the paper. I started to do things I love more than just sit in a corner. Then I read this story of a person who was depressed and pulled herself out of it. That made me realize that although she did not describe the emotions she felt, because you never can, I could relate to her. That one story made me see that I am not going through this alone and that it is ok to be depressed, but only if u don’t stay depressed. That story was the turning point in my depression. I started to listen to more songs to free myself. I started to ignore other mistakes and control my emotions with time. Although I never had suicidal thoughts, for those who do and are depressed I want you all to know: I know you all have a reality that you wish for, think about it and that’s is all you need to change it and make it come true. I slowly stared seeing how I was not a failure and slowly develop interest in things and I took a week long break. Where I only listened to music write about whatever comes in my mind and get good sleep. I slowly pulled myself out of depression and I started to appreciate the people who were there for me. I started to see improvement in character feeling, and actions. So I was depression free and came back to how I was. For me the turning point was the story that helped me realize that although I think if the world I want, and can act upon to make it the world I live in. When doing that start doing this that make you feel relaxed and calm, for me it was listening to music. I hope my story can share a a turning point to those who are going through this unexplained time. I just want everyone to remember: All these feelings are temporary if you choose them to be. The only this permanent is you, and don’t loose yourself by dwelling on temporary things, instead I believe you all have the power to pull yourself out and be happy.