Remember

Dedication: Myself

Sometimes we forget how tough we are, how resilient. That even in the most awful, difficult and painful circumstances, we come out of the other side. It almost feels impossible when you are right in the middle of those times to ever see the light of day. It feels like it will last forever. But the truth is, nothing ever does. Good or bad.

3 years ago today I would’ve been on my sofa in my living room in that house. A blanket over me, trying to sleep. The only way to describe my emotions then was utter fear. I’d told him I was leaving, but petrified that he wouldn’t let me go. I can feel now the utter desperation I had to get out of there, every bit of me was being drained away and nobody could see it. This was on me, nobody else. And it was the scariest thing I’ve ever had to do.

I knew he’d never physically hurt me, but the emotional and mental power he had over me was overwhelming. And nobody ever knew a thing.

But I did it. I left. And surprisingly enough, he didn’t follow.

I’m still rebuilding myself now, I have no trust or faith in anyone except my beautiful family and my best friends. The likelihood of me getting into another relationship is zero to non existent. Probably why I have the relationships I have, no commitment.

I was totally broken but one day surely I will be repaired ❤️