Hi, It’s been a crazy year as we all know but I think this is what made me think about life officially. I am a 15-year-old student of high school and have a girlfriend of 1 year right now. She and I had some rocky times we broke up, got back together but we are all fine in the end working things out. But, this time It has all changed. We broke up about 2 months ago and got back together again because of mental health problems. During that time she and I would find out when we got back together she decided to do stuff with one of her guy friends at the time just to get over the feelings. I had no issue with that obviously, we weren’t together and it wasn’t my problem. But then after 2 months of dating again she comes to me telling me she hasn’t gotten her period for 2 months. I immediately told her to take a test the next day as she is also 15 years old. The next day, come back to school she comes up to me and tells me both of them was positive. I hugged her and had to wrap my head around it for the next couple of hours in school. I was thinking “She can’t have this kid her at home life is terrible already” “but also if we tried maybe it would work since I know my mother had me at 16 and we are great now.” She then told me she was gonna abort it which I understood obviously and I told her multiple times. It’s your body your choice I know that I am not the biological father but I know that since I can’t have a kid of my own as a trans man. Why can’t we take this into consideration but if she really wants it I am ok with it. 2 days into finding it out I was looking up how to care for a kid and how to care for someone who is pregnant. I was holding her stomach and rubbing my finger on her stomach as a sign that I cared even if she was pregnant. I felt this spark after 2 days that man… I could really do this if anything. I can get a job and help support them if she really wanted me to. But we are 15 I had to remind myself. She then tells me that she has an appointment for Saturday of that week that she would be having the abortion. But she also said that she wanted to wait another month with the child before anything. I was ok with that until I realized until I soon found out I was severely attached to this unborn child. Even if I was attached I still supported her the whole way but then I had to tell her that day if she really wanted this to work out. If she really wanted an abortion then she should do it soon before if she waits a month I will not be mentally prepared for this. She then told me that she was going to get it done and I said that’s ok. Later when I got home all I could think of was the possibilities, since what if this was a calling. I didn’t think of our relationship just as a high school thing anymore I was thinking of this in a Grown-up way. I was fully committed to this in general but I am happy that she decided to do what she wants. Even if I cried in the night over this even, I am still gonna be here for her. Through it all. I decided to give the unborn baby a name to make me honor them and my love for them even if they weren’t able to live out their journey in life. They will live it in my mind and forever even as an almost teen father. Oakley my awakening.