Survivor of teenage domestic violence

Dedication: To me as a teenager! Look at you now girl!

Hello, I wanted wanted to share my story to reach out to other young girls who may feel alone and not sure if what they are going through is normal or not because when I was 15 and experienced what I went through I had no idea this was totally not normal and actually illegal! So please read my story below and if this sounds familiar to what you might be experiencing then please get out and get help!

So where do I begin, I was a naive 15 year old girl (insecure, easy to manipulate and clearly naive! I met a boy who was a few years older than me, he approached me asked for my number all seemed great! I was into him big time! Things slowly but surely started to change he became controlling initially and I stupidly thought that this was normal and that he must really like me to care so much about ‘where I am all the time’. Things progressed from there and he became incredibly violent and even more controlling he controlled what I wore, what I ate and who my friends were and if I fought back on any of it he would hit me. At one point he tried to control my birth control as he wanted a baby! I was still only 15 at this time. At this point I was completely unaware that this was not normal. It was never talked about in school or by friends it seemed that this was just a normal relationship. It all came to an end when he pulled a knife out on me in public and was arrested, my parents intervened and forced me to leave and report everything to the police. I remember my mum saying to me that if I didn’t leave and go to the police I would be dead one day and she didn’t want to bury her child! It hit me then how serious this situation had become and I went to the police told my story. I went to court at 16 and was cross examined by his lawyer and stood up and told my story! He ended up getting sentenced to 6 years for statuary rape, GBH and carrying knife with intent.

After everything that happened I had support from charities but at that time a lot of domestic violence groups were aimed at older women, married or with children and for me that just wasn’t the case I was a teenager and just felt again alone in what I had been through.

I ended up being an advocate for schools in my area telling my story and highlighting that domestic violence can happen to younger women/teenagers and was able to show other young girls warning signs and what to look out for in current and future relationships.

I hope by sharing my story I can also help other girls around the world know that it is not normal!!