“I grew up in a home where love and support were scarce. My dad’s words still echo in my mind: ‘You’re useless.’ The physical pain from his beatings was nothing compared to the emotional scars he left me with. My mum, who I thought would be my protector, stood by and did nothing. Even my aunt, who I thought I could trust, joined in, telling me I was the worst.
They called me a liar, a worthless trash, and said I was good for nothing. The constant barrage of hurtful words and actions made me feel like I was worthless. But that wasn’t all – I was also sexually abused, leaving me with scars that can never fully heal.
Outside of home, I tried to find solace in school, but it was a different kind of hell. I was bullied relentlessly, taunted and teased until I felt like I was nothing. I began to hate myself, wondering what was wrong with me, why I deserved such treatment.
I tried to find solace in friendships, but they turned out to be toxic. They used me, drained me, and left me feeling empty. I lost people I loved, and the pain seemed unbearable.
But then I realized something – water is thicker than blood. Strangers have treated me better than my own family. They’ve shown me kindness, compassion, and love without condition. They’ve proven that family isn’t just about blood ties, but about the bonds we choose to create.
Trapped in my room, tears streaming down, pleading for help, but no one’s around. The words in my heart, they echo and scream, but poetry’s my solace, my only dream. Online friends, my refuge and peace, a world away from the pain and release. But even in cyberspace, fears still creep, Dad’s words, a constant, haunting sleep.
‘You’re not good enough’, he says with a sneer, ‘I’ll kill you’, he threatens, and I tremble with fear. High school’s hard enough, but this is too much, I’m lost and alone, with no way to clutch. I’ve been stabbed in the back by those I trusted, hurt by those I loved. I’m exhausted from trying to find someone, anyone, who truly cares.
But every door I open leads to more pain, more lies, more disappointment. Even my family doesn’t know the real me. They see a mask, a facade, a pretend version of myself. I’m suffocating under the weight of their expectations, their negativity, their constant criticism.
Outside, I’m a different person. I put on a brave face, a smile, a laugh. But inside, I’m dying. I’m tired of being strong, tired of being alone, tired of being hurt. I don’t know how much more I can take. The pain is suffocating me, crushing me, killing me slowly.
I need someone to talk to, someone to trust, someone to be me with. But it seems like that someone doesn’t exist. I’m trapped in this never-ending cycle of hurt and betrayal. I don’t know how to escape, how to break free. I just want to be me, without fear of judgment, without fear of rejection. I just want to be loved, truly loved, for who I am.”