Choose yourself first , before anyone.

I was 18 when my father committed suicide, My father’s suicide was the single most painful event in my life. There were times during my grief where I wasn’t sure if the suffering would ever end. But I kept slowly trudging along. Slowly after that, I started losing faith in myself, soon after that I got into a relationship. As a woman, you walk into all kinds of unknown situations that cause you to fall in love, put someone else’s needs before your own, and make unbelievable sacrifices. As time goes by, falling in love has its consequences. My life turned upside down. I was so in love that I started to forget about myself and my happiness. I was so lost in someone that I forgot my existence, I lost everything, my job and the respect my family had for me. I started living off of his money soon, with every argument, I was called out for using it.with the heat of the argument I was told everytime thats it is his home, not mine. I was told that he was feeding me with his money not mine. Once again, my life shattered. This was the second most painful phase of my life after dads death. I few days back I tried to take my life. I was found hanging from the fan. Because I couldn’t take it anymore. But I was saved. And I’ve seen people who cares about me. People I thought who had forgotten about me . And today, I’m in my journey to become a better person. I’m working on myself to be strong and independent just as how I was before, strong, fierce and outspoken. I have made a promise that I will choose myself first before anyone , from now on. This is my story. To all the strong ladies out there, It is so important to take time for yourself and find clarity. The most important relationship is the one you have with yourself.