How you feel is correct 100% of the time even when it feels disloyal. How you feel is correct 100% of the time.
As Father’s Day approaches those of us with tumultuous relationships with our fathers go through an internal civil war, of sorts, because on the one had he is dad who played a part in my literal existence but on the other hand he is also the man who once used me as a physical weapon in a physical altercation with my mother. There is no Father’s Day card that reads I survived in spite of the horrors you put on display for me to watch, Happy Father’s Day. It’s hard.
It took me a while to get to a place of gratitude with my father but as a 34-year-old woman I thank him, I thank him, all the scars he inflicted on me with his actions towards my mother and his words towards me have made me an extraordinary protector of children. I have become the adult that i prayed would come to my rescue as a child. Thank you, daddy.