I am a 40 year old female. I got on here today to share my story of addiction in hopes that it will help someone. I was introduced to Crack cocaine at the age of 17. My sister introduced me to it. I prostitutes to get it,I cheated on my husband. I did whatever I needed to do to get it. I stole from my kids,I went shop lifting I even got caught shop lifting with my baby. I didn’t care who I hurt. I didn’t know that I had caused so much damage to the ones that loved me the most. I took my babies out with me . I used them as pawns to get what I wanted.asked people for money,I remember hearing my children cry because they didn’t want to go I left them home alone. I even took my daughter.with me one time when I went to turn a trick. I didn’t care and because the drug had such a tight grip on me I didn’t realize how much emotional damage and scarring that I caused them. I went to a lot of rehabs and stayed clean for a while and then ended up going back out,my life was spiraling out of control once again. I thought that my will power and determination was enough well it wasn’t. I spent money that I knew was needed to provide for my children I sold my food.stamps and everything. I remember my kids being hungry. Well last year in December of 2021 I had a dss case opener on me I found myself back in the same situations I had been in before. My husband I fought all the time his drinking and my using was tearing our family apart,it finally happened our using separated us ,our kids had been taken away,my best friend took both of my girls in so that they wouldn’t go into the system
That was the hardest time of my life . I had never been separated from my kids since they were born once again I put my kids in a situation that they didn’t deserve. I got myself into a shelter,I got there and on valentines day of this year 2022 I made another dumb move I went out and got high and didn’t come in to the shelter at curfew. On February 15,of 2022. God sat me down, he made a way for me to get back into the shelter,I then went to get some help I went through another intense out patient program I graduated,God.gave me my kids back I’m now on the family side of the shelter ,he has given me favor with people, my children are happy I allow my children to talk to me about how they felt about my addiction I have been clean every since I make no mistake about it, God’s strength, mercy and love is what brought me through all glory and honor.is due to him and him alone. I am 8 months clean and God still is holding on to me. You.see no matter who you are or what you did God is waiting with open arms to take you by the hand and lead and guide you. You just have to surrender everything to him and put him first. I know for a fact that if God can save a addict like me he can do the same fir anyone else. I share my story because there someone out there that ashamed or think that they are alone, but your not don’t ever let anyone make you feel like a failure or that you can’t change,I hear in my group one time that we are not addicts we are survivors of addiction. I hope my story reach as many people as possible and know you.never walk alone and God is always with you.